Micky ArisonIn an exclusive story, Cruise Law News has learned that cruise industry giant Carnival Corporation plans to incorporate its business in the United States (in Florida). Carnival intends to announce this historic development tomorrow, April 2nd, at Carnival’s headquarters in Miami. 

Since 1972, Carnival has incorporated its business and registered its cruise ships in the country of Panama. For over 40 years, Carnival cruise ships have flown the flag of Panama in order to avoid the onerous safety regulations, excessive labor laws, unreasonable environmental laws, and high taxes of the United States of America. 

Cruise Law News learned of this historic event when high-profile maritime lawyer Jim Walker bumped into Carnival’s Chairman Micky Arison at court side last night when Arison’s basketball team, the Miami Heat, lost to the San Antonio Spurs.  Maritime ace lawyer Walker asked Arison: "Micky, if Dwayne Wade earns several hundreds of million dollars from Carnival and pays tens of millions of dollars in U.S. taxes, don’t you think it is fair that Carnival – which earns over 16 billion dollars a year in cruise ticket sales – pays its fair share of U.S. taxes?"

Perhaps it was the euphoria of Carnival repealing the automatic man overboard safety law, but Micky was ecstatic. "Yes, let’s do it!" he said handing maritime lawyer Walker a half-eaten hot dog and three-quarters of a warm Bud Light which a Miami cheerleader handed Micky in the first quarter of the previous game a few days earlier.

While quickly consuming the beer and hot dog in the excitement of the moment, cruise lawyer Walker happened to have Florida articles of incorporation which he handed to Micky to sign as well as U.S. flags to fly on the Carnival fleet of cruise ships. 

Arison has been under intense pressure lately following fires, collisions, sinkings, poop-cruises, pirate-Carnival Corporationattacks, norovirus outbreaks and a Jon Secada concert which have ruined the last 100 Carnival cruises. Senator Jay Rockefeller recently called Arison a "scallywag" on national TV. Rockefeller challenged Arison to pay his fair share of Carnival CorporationU.S. taxes on the billion-dollar bounty his foreign-flagged cruise ships collect from the U.S. taxpaying citizens on the high seas.

Micky commented that he was embarrassed that his father Ted, the founder of Carnival Cruise Lines 40 years ago, denounced his U.S. citizenship in order to avoid paying some 10 billion dollars in U.S. taxes.

"I want to make certain that Carnival pays one hundred percent of our U.S. tax obligations (estimated to be over $5,000,000,000 a year) plus be subjected to the most rigorous U.S. safety, wage,and labor laws and the most stringent U.S. environmental regulations, Micky announced over the arena’s PA system: "It’s time that poor, over-worked crew members from India and Nicaragua who earn $500 working 360 hours a month be entitled to the full benefit of U.S. employment laws, a 401(k) retirement fund, severance pay, and a college fund for their children!"

While appreciative of Arison’s change of heart, sources say Walker was miffed that Arison demanded that he pay $6 for the remains of the hot dog and $7.50 for the rest of the Bud Light.

 

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  • dday

    Haha.. nice one!

  • Jerome Goldchain

    Great April Fools Day joke.
    Too out of caricature to be believed though.
    Will never happen to this greedy company,

  • John Goldsmith

    And a Happy April Fools Day to you too.

  • june

    Yes.. thanks god… thank you.. hope my salary will change to US standard.. its so good to hear it. Even how hard and and challenging as a deckhand onboard .it worth enough if they pay the standard wages.. thanks sir micky…

  • Baltazar A. Rafales

    Dear Atty. Jim Walker,

    Please help us to remind Mr. Arison that Holland America Line Inc. (HAL) is owing over $5 Billion US Dollars to the Filipino seafarers and over $8 Billion US Dollars to the Indonesian Seafarers with respect to purposely violating and/or to failure to comply voluntarily with the Foreign (International) Voyage Law and/or to failure to comply with the Seafarer Wage Act, 46 U.S.C. § 10313, in deducting various amounts from seafarers wages resulting in the failure to pay all seafarers wages at the end of voyage(s) upon which we served as required by law.

    Baltazar A. Rafales

    (a) Plaintiff; Federal Expert Witness; Exhibitory; Declaratory and Filipino Class Action Representative in Rafales v. HAL et al and

    (b) Federal Expert Witness; Exhibitory and Declaratory in Priyanto v. HAL et al

  • Jim

    micky its time to give it back all the money of the seafarer.that u stolled.god is good all the time.

  • chez

    This shoud include royal caribbean cruise lines, American govt. Should also look into what rccl is doing to its crew members.

  • Jesus

    As a,crewmember of rccl i think. This is one or the best idea ever this glentleman came out .lots of crewmembers need to be under a protection and benefits of USA low .ihope that this idea come thro

  • Zi

    As good as it may seem, please dont forget that whatever they have thought to give to CMs there is always a payback to us. They may give all this and more but lets not celebrate yet. We may be entitled to pay US tax too and if that happens then all this huge addition to our salaries will be useless when the time comes.

  • prabhakar shanmugam

    As s Former crew member I am very glad to hear that. I hope from now rccl and other companies pay right to the crew member. Great news thankyou.

  • monique

    Carnival playing that same old April Fool’s joke again.

  • steve

    What about princess cruises they do the same with crew,they pay 800$ for filipinos,indian,Indonesian,mexican&chinise whereas rest are paid 1200$ like europeans,southamericans etc.see the difference of 400$ in fact we asians work harder then them.isin it racism?they can spend witout hesitating like in crew bar or they can buy iPhone but not we,we just watch how they enjoy.we work,eat and sleep.

  • kris

    Mr jim..i don’t see any sign of that in here on the ship that I notice now carnival cut more money from crews and let the guest pull out the gratuity that carnival know that gratuity is the crew salary

  • MaDe

    That just the idea mr micky but it will never apply to carnival… Look at the hotel steward now… No more promotion to higher position.. Their salary only $500 a month… They can get money that much in their place for a month… No more future in carnival… Better dont come for work in this company

  • Gilbert congreso

    But still the people on the ship who work hard did not get the right,esp.the man behind the mill